I really hate this. This feeling in the pit of my stomach and hot numbness in my knuckles and fingertips. I don't feel well at all. All I can do is fucking cry it off as if the stress was pooling inside me and wanted an outlet.
Fuck fuck fuck.
There are some days were I feel alight- But it's either horrible or alright.
When I'm "alright",
I don't feel anything. Don't want to cry, scream, laugh, nothing.
It's when I'm OK do I feel like I'm wasting my time and haven't been living life to the fullest because I just don't give a fuck because I don't feel anything.
It's when I get these sudden surges of sadness that only hit harder when I try to block them do I truly feel alive.
and that's just wonderful. Truly fantastic.
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